Titles are the bane of my existance

I thought I would take a moment while Jake is still sleeping to blog a little. He hasn’t been sleeping well at all today. Between 8:30 and 4 I think he slept maybe a total of an hour here and there. So frustrating.

Went to Plunket. I’m doing a PEPE course for 6weeks to 1year. There were heaps of people there today compared to only 6 mums last week. It wasn’t fun. I didn’t feel like socialising and I’m the only one bottle feeding so when he decided he was hungry I felt really awkward. All the mums that were there last week understand why I gave up, but most of the women there today weren’t there last week, and while I’d like to think they weren’t judging me I still felt judged. Probably cos I still judge myself. I hate that I’m bottle feeding even though it’s so much better for both of us.

Anywho. Last week I got along really well with this chick Andi, so today I gave her my cell number so hopefully some kind of friendship can develop there, though I hardly got to speak to her today. I also got a text from one of the chicks that was at my anti-natal class this morning and we’re gonna catch up on Thurs at some point. I must remember to text her again and sort out a time and place. It’s nice to be finally making some friends here; it’s just so damned hard. I wonder if normal me that I don’t know is extroverted or introverted. I swing between the extremes, but was always told I was extroverted. But then I was also always told that I prefer things to be open to change and not set in stone, yet I actually prefer things to be fairly rigid and I hate being late and dislike people being late. One of the things I am having to examine is how much of how I am is actually me, and how much is me being what I was taught that I am. Does that even make sense?

I was perusing the forum over at KiwiWriters (I still haven’t made a decision re: to HalfNoC or not to HalfNoC, btw.) and found a link to this 750 words thing. I decided to give it a go as writing like that is just what I need and will no doubt provide some insight on my mind. We shall see how long it lasts.

And it’s June, already. That in itself is depressing. Officially winter. That I don’t mind so much, I prefer winter over summer, it’s just tricky when you have a baby and no car. Another couple of months and my brother can teach me to drive .

Speaking of little brother, he’s coming round for dinner tonight. God knows what we’ll be eating as I have nothing organised. Time to ring hubby and put in a supermarket order I think.

And Jake’s still sleeping!!! Thank goodness.

Party, Obligations, and the KiwiWriters’ Notebook

Kim had her flat warming party last night. The theme was Pokémon, and so I went as Butterfree thanks to some wings and pipe cleaner feelers, and Dale was a generic Pokémon trainer. It was fun, I guess, in a hanging out with annoying people you do know, and lots of people you don’t know kind of way. We watched some Pokémon, and I realised that although it had been the in thing when I was about 12, I had never seen it (we didn’t get TV reception). It was all good until one chick started trying to convert the asians to Christianity; then I went and sat in the hallway. I’m not a party pooper, I just think that it’s not appropriate to try convert people at a party, especially when he had said “don’t try convert me” and she said “I won’t” yet then spent the next hour trying to, and so I didn’t swear at anyone I left. We crashed at Jen’s house, and this morning did the hour trek home (we were going to catch a bus, but it didn’t show up).

So now I’m trying to organise what I’m going to do with the rest of my day; the last day of summer (although the weather outside claims summer is way over). I feel the weight of so many things I have to do pressing down on me. I need to get the dittoGUI help file finished (I haven’t forgotten about you dad!); I still haven’t finished that recipe book for Ro; I need to post my little brother’s birthday present (his birthday was at the start of Jan); and I’m still hoping to get my short story finished for the Collection Challenge.

And Uni goes back tomorrow, which mean assignments will need to be done, and texts will need to be read. I will admit I have already started reading my Linguistics Analysis which is going to be an awesome paper, I’ve been learning about how language is arbitrary, and what a lexeme is . All interesting stuff (yes, I’m weird for liking this stuff). I was thinking of skipping uni tomorrow (that sounds bad, I know, first day and I’m not going to go), cos I don’t have any classes, and I could work on that massive to do list of mine (it’s way longer than what is listed above), but I’m expected to be part of the library tour group. Sure, I don’t need to be shown the library, and neither to the other 4th year BAs that will be doing it, but you get $3 printing credit for following an old lady around and asking dumb questions like “when do we get our $3 printing credit”.

Something very exciting happened yesterday. I went to the Palmy writers meet-up (not for long, just to say hi) and I was give the KiwiWriters’ Notebook/Journal. Basically it’s a notebook being sent around the world to KiwiWriters members and they can write  something in it. It started its life in England, came to NZ, went to America, and then back to NZ, and it has to go to Canada at some point too for Chibi. I wasn’t on the list to receive it, but I had posted on the forum, and so I was given it, yay! So I have to decide what to write in it, and then chose someone to post it to.

Anyway, that’s about it from me. Keep Smiling All!!

Oh yeah…

… I have a blog.

I’ve had a quiet few days. Dale has had his first three day weekend of hopefully not too many to come. Thank goodness StudyLink have increased my allowance by that $3 a week. It has been nice to spend some quality time with him, although he has spent a fair bit of time playing Portal. I must admit I was glad I was there when he finished it as the end credits song is very funny. I would recommend playing the game through just for that — I’m not sure the song would be quite as amusing if you don’t know the story, but if you want to check it out it is here.

Last night we had a good old Brown pot-luck dinner. Charissa, my cousin, is leaving home tomorrow. She is moving to ChCh to train how to look after people that play sport. She has been warned that when we get there we will be around at her flat to eat her food, although she insists it will be vice versa. The night was endurable, but everyone wanted to know what I was going to do when I’ve go my degree, and I don’t really know. The “I’m going to do a barista course and work in a cafe” didn’t go down so well except for with Ro, but she has the same temperament as I do, so we think alike a lot. Her belly was huge before Christmas, but seemed about normal this time as she has just entered her third trimester. ‘Henry’ is due on ANZAC day, so he my be called Albert after his uncle who was in Gallipoli. I can hardly believe I will have 14 cousins! Maybe Ro & Andrew will have one more so grandmum has a nice round 20 grandchildren.

As for study. I am a little concerned about my current assignment because it seems to be the easiest assignment ever. Not in the research, but in the writing, the words are just coming to me and flowing right. It’s almost like I’m writing fiction when my muse is talking to me, but it’s non-fiction so it feels weird. But I shouldn’t complain, I should just be glad it will be finished on time to be in tomorrow. I get to celebrate by going to a Gilmore Girls marathon sleep over with Jen, Kim and Panna. I’m not so sure about the sleep over bit, and I find Gilmore Girls hard to watch since me & Tash stopped being friend cos it was our thing, but I’ll just toughen up and bear it.

Dale should have finished watching South Park by now so it’s probably sleeping time. Adios

To do list and Friends

I have finally made some real progress on my massive to do list. I have not yet managed to tick anything off yet, but I have it all down to a managable size. Now all I have to do is catch up on my house work. I’m thinking about bribing Dale into doing the dishes. It’s too hot to stand in front of the sink up to the elbows in hot water.

As for friends, I’m a bit stuck on one of them. As I was growing up I didn’t have friends, so when I did find someone that would endure me I was not picky. Now, as an intellegent young woman, people tend to like me. My question is, what if you really don’t like them back so much.

So, this particular friend turned up today, made everything I said turn back to her, and then told me I was coming to her party and what I was going to wear. I have never been one to do what I’m told; infact, telling what to do is really the one sure way of ensuring I don’t do it. I dislike her behaviour and the way she treats people and her naïveness, but naïveness is my pet peeve. It doesn’t help that Dale doesn’t like her at all, and when I talk to him about it he just makes my feelings seem appropriate.

So I feel bad for not liking her, but I resent having my life organised by someone who is so self centred. Dale’s already said we’re not going to the party, but I have a few months up my sleeve; I will let her down gently ‘cos I can’t be a bitch.

Back to work *sigh*